Thanks to my former husband for this one. After all these years, he remembers I like a good joke!
There was an old cowhand who owned a small ranch in Montana.
The Montana Wage and Hour Department claimed he was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent to interview him. "I need a list of employees and how much you pay them," demanded the agent. "Well," reported the rancher, "There's my ranch hand who's been with me 3 years. I pay him $600 a week and room and board. The cook has been here 18 months and I pay her $500 a week plus room and board. Then there's the
half-wit who works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 a week and pays his own room and board and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night." "That's the guy I want to talk to, the half-wit," says the agent. "That would be me," replied the rancher.